9/15/02 -- Fire Update

Hey everyone. *_*

I am just trying to be patient, be thankful that no one was hurt, and be hopeful towards the future. The holidays are going to be tough, and I know it. All those relatives asking about the room, rehashing it all over again. Presents others receive that I once had, reminding me of stuff I lost...it's going to get worse before it gets better. But I am an ARIES, DAMNIT! I was BORN stubborn. I'll deal.

You know what's nifty? Finding out all the freakish things surrounding all of this. Like, my room was the only part of the house that was damaged. Apparently, the door was closed and prevented the fire from spreading...however. All the posters hanging INSIDE the door were unharmed. My TV & VCR sat flush up against the wall to the left of the door - and they MELTED down to the metal. Yet nothing on my door was touched? My computer was at the shop getting fixed the day of the fire - so it is ok. Oh - and you want to know something KILLER? 2 days ago, I was sifting through the stuff in my closet which was mainly ashes & charred books...but tucked in a corner was a tote bag. It SHOULD have burned (or at least browned a little), but it didn't. But that's not the weird part - see, I went to this huge Comic Book Convention in San Diego last summer. I met all my favorite comic book pros and got a ton of comics & rare holofoil issues signed. I had them up on my walls, but a few months ago, I went through this weird decorating phase. I took a lot of the stuff down from my walls and revamped the decor. I put all the rare & signed issues that I'd got in San Diego into a tote bag, and stuffed it in the closet, for some reason, instead of filing them away with my other comics....and voila. They are the beginning of my new comic book collection.

I started crying when I found that bag. There is just something about signatures obtained personally, you know? They are as valuable sentimentally as a picture album. It really hit me hard to think I had lost them. If I hadn't hidden those issues away (and I NEVER do that - I am always really good about filing comics as soon as I read them) then they would have burned. Creepy, no? X_x

So, I am beginning my new comic book collection as I write this. I managed to salvage about 300 comics (out of over 3000) from the fire, and am trying to recoup my collection slowly, through various ebay sellers and past clients...it will be a long process, but fun in its own way. I mean, I get to use all my knowledge from my past collection - I know what issues NOT to buy the 2nd time around...I am only going to collect alternate covers and special issues. Oh! Some nifty guy on the internet sent me this comic book collection software, so now I can begin fresh and inventory ALL my comics from the beginning. Cool, huh? Thank you, Bill. God, I love all you sweet internet people. *_*

Last week, I had a nightmare about the fire. I woke up and instantly had to run to the bathroom...I don't know why I vomited. I was overheated, shaking, and I had no idea why. I just started crying. I guess it was everything that had been pent up inside me since the fire. I know I needed to be uncorked, but it still freaked me out. I dislike losing control of things - one of the reasons why I stay away from hard drugs. @_o

Besides that, I hate asking for help - my parents can't really help me...they are both very busy with their careers and money-making and I am really the only one who can go through that pile of ashes in the driveway and make sense of it, anyway. I have been trying to finish my inventory lists from the fire, but it's a pretty tough job, trying to remember everything you had & where you got it...and how much you paid & how much it's worth, etc. It's mindboggling what insurance companies expect us to do.

In reality, there was supposed to be an "antiques/collectibles" appraiser that was hired by the insurance company that was going to do these freaking lists for me...but she doesn't want to DO HER JOB and get her little hands dirty. I mean - HELLO!- like I want to do it? It is traumatic enough for me to have to walk past a pile of ashes (what used to be the stuff in my room) every morning on the way out to my Bronco. Now, I am having to touch each item & cry over it every 5 minutes. As an added bonus, this woman waited almost a MONTH to even BOTHER to tell us that she wasn't going to sift through what was left - a MONTH! Because of her, the construction company was delayed, and I lost much of what may have been recoverable due to mildew since we were not allowed to touch the pile of stuff until we got the OK from the insurance company. *sigh* This apprasier pisses me off. Some people should just not get up in the morning - just stay asleep & do the rest of the world a favor, you know?

Thank you guys for being so patient while all of this is going on. I had to put off a few auction wishlists for some of you and I am sorry. Things should be up & running soon. I got my computer back & am planning on uploading auctions next monday, since it is Columbus Day (what a STUPID holiday, btw!! Let's just ask the Native Americans what THEY think of it...) and I don't have school.

I have just been so exhausted this week that I almost quit my job (I am working with pretty horrible managers)...I know this situation will get better eventually, but I am clenching my fists and doing my darndest to get through this and hope for the best (and try to rememeber to SLEEP & eat in the meantime). -_-

BUT. I have always believed that there was a silver lining to everything in life. The moral of this update? Every little thing is related & you are constantly being passed signals, whether you realize it or not. We are all here for a reason & there is no use worrying over it. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and I have never really understood that phrase until now, after what's happened.

You have to take what's given to you and not be upset when it is something you don't like - you have to deal and use it to your advantage. Make lemons out of lemonade and all that. Let life do it's very worst & stand up to the challenge. Tell it to eat $h!t and die. :p

So that's my rant. Have an opinion? Email me.

More Rants | Updates | DroolWorthy Art Galleries | Comic Scans | Links | Email me!